On Sensuality

Sensuality is a word that we may have specific polarities around - either attraction to the pleasure and seduction of the sensory world, or opposition to feeling because it has been ingrained in us as “lewd,'' ‘unimportant,’ or ‘shameful’. 

I’ve held onto my sensuality (for the most part) through the years—refusing to shut down and stop feeling because I felt it to be one of the most important things there could ever be in this world. Even when my sensuality and sexuality were challenged by a partner who refused to respect my boundaries, I dove deeper into remembering my own self, my own experience. While I did this in a way that was full of urgency because of trauma, I found some of the only solace I could in the present moment by breathing, dancing, feeling.

And yes, in those moments I definitely turned to sexual pleasure, orgasm, and listening to what truly delighted me as my compass—to turn me back onto the intense powers of FEELING. 

So, sensuality comes from this place, for me. It’s inextricably interwoven with sexuality, of course, but it’s SO MUCH MORE.

photos by Sasha Alexander - Ole

Sensuality comes from our ability to sense—to connect our physical sensory organs (nose, ears,  eyes, tongue, nerve endings, inner ear, musculo-skeletal structures, etc…) to our brain. Here the mind (distinct from the organ-brain) interprets these data inputs and charges them with meaning, memory, intention, and firmly roots us into the external world. A sense of self in space comes from our senses, and a sense of self as ourselves comes from interpreting our sensory inputs and listening to the deeper senses we have such as intuition, pleasure, and authenticity. 

As a means of control, the cultural structures (religion/monotheism, capitalism, government,  patriarchy, etc…) often tell us that it doesn’t matter what we feel; that we should align with what’s been proclaimed ‘right’ by those in power. Humans aligned with their intuition and feelings, living in a sensory place of delight, play, and pleasure are hard to control. Humans who are rather despondent, turned off, numbed out, and feeling incomplete/dissatisfied are easy to sell things to, get to work harder/more, or … any number of means to an end.

Our sensuality (or sensory inputs) is ours. It belongs to our bodies, minds, and spirits. It IS us, and we are it—inextricably. (though traumatic experiences may divorce the two for a time). This is sovereignty—where we can find true joy and happiness.  

video by Alize Jireh Yaccino, music by Mason Jiller

It is in this centered place that we sense life anew. Our senses dial the needle of our compass to what feels good, and when infused with a large dose of non-judgement, we can begin to see the joy and the feels—yes even ‘good’—within the depths of sorrow, the hot rages of anger, and the feel of slime grime. Everything becomes part of the larger scope of feeling.

This is how we know we’re alive. 

Alive. Awake. Present. Imperfectly Perfect. 

Diving into sensuality takes a lot of courage. When you part the curtains to the truth of how you feel, your life may want to change drastically at its core.  And that’s okay. 

Here you align your needle to the pleasure of living life. 

For in the end, what IS it all about?

In my eyes, finding joy in living.  And that joy is activated with a healthy understanding of how to transform each moment into a present awareness of the sensuality of being viscerally alive - and feeling the waves of life cascade upon us as we embrace the messiness of being wholly truly human. 

I ask you to allow yourself to become more attuned to your senses this month, this timespan.  At the time of writing, it’s February. It’s the cold mid-winter here in Northern Hemispheres - and that invitation holds a depth of aligning with internal sensuality before the awakening of spring awakens our senses anew. 

MUSING QUESTIONS 

How can you find sensuality in the chill?  

When do align with your senses in the present moment, most?  What activity, time of day/month, or experience? 

Why does/doesn’t sensuality matter to you?  

I hope to see you in class on my Patreon portal, where we can explore these concepts with movement.  Sign up at the 11 tier or higher to access classes. Last year, Feb 2021 was also themed for Sensuality, so if you desire a robust array of additional classes, join the Scholar Tier ($44/month) for access to all the classes I’ve ever taught. 

xo

gaea